Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
