dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
