oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
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