I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
