the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
We don't watch enough power rangers
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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