This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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