Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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