he wants to bone in the snuggie
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
