I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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