But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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