yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
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