Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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