Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize