you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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