He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
