Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
