evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Randomize
