The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
