I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Randomize
