Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Randomize
