whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
