apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Randomize
