my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Randomize
