it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
What the fuck I just showed up to court still drunk and the judge told me I smelled like his wife
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Randomize
