ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Randomize