also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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