i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
