And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
Randomize
