Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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