Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
