I feel like I'm in dance class right now
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Randomize
