hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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