my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
