Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
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