Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
i already hear my dad disowning me
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
