I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize