i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
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