I wanna bring you to show and tell
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
