ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
What changed your mind?
Being sober
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
