The maid of honor just puked.
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Randomize
