I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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