We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
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