Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Randomize
