I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
