is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
