Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize