She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Randomize
