We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
