Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
