in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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