This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Randomize