she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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