break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Randomize